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Beauty Up My Life

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Life is Difficult

I am not in a very good mood today. Life still goes on. It can't stop even though I am feeling down. I still have see people when I really don't want to. I still have to work when I don't have the mood or the energy to do so. Life is so... I don't know what to call it. I just want a peace of moment but I know I'll never get it. Lfe's been too busy and I am now wondering, whether to be a part of it is a good thing or not.

It's hard to live alone and it's much harder still to live with people. People are individuals, each with a mind of their own. Never know when will our words and actions hurt them. Even if it's just something that you blurted out unknowingly, it might still be a BIG issue to those around you.

I don't know whether am I consider as someone that can be friends or not, but I do try to be one. But I guess, just trying to be one isn't good enough. I need to be one.

Wanting to change and had to change attitude, it's just one word difference, but yet it is so different in both ways. One is that will give you permanent results while the other won't last very long. Wanting to change is to please yourself, while have to change is to please someone else. Isn't that true? More often that not, people change because they felt the pressure of wanting other people to like them better or to think of them better, therefore they change. It's not that they change to improve themselves, but to please others. Isn't that ridiculous? All of us do the same thing, whether we like it or not. To change ourselves for other people, sometimes I wonder is it really a must for us to survive in this world fill with different people.

I don't really know. Someday I hope to find out about it. But in the mean time, I don't think there'll be any answer towards it.

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