You know, I think my dream last night is a SIGN.
I don't remember how it started, but I do remember it was at a place that I always go to.
It feels and looks like Uncle Albert's house. I think it is.
He was there, sitting and chatting with me.
"You want to go to your parent's house at the hill?" I asked.
He didn't answer. But just smiled.
His eyes showed that he cared. It was a warm, fuzzy feeling. The feeling of you know that he likes you. That he loves you.
And suddenly my sister pop out from nowhere and walk away.
And he placed his hand around my shoulder and was gently squeezing, like massaging it. I remember the warm hands and the strength of it massaging my right shoulder. It was warm. It was full of strength but was gentle enough. And my sister return and asked him "What are you doing?" Both of us just laugh it off and my sister was gone.
And don't know what were we chatting about and I replied him, "My grandmother died when I was in Form 3."
"Oh. I'm sorry." He had those sad, puppy eyes. I was about to cry.
Came in my Uncle Peng Chuan. He brought his friends along. And he was smiling at us all the way.
"What's your name?" Uncle Peng Chuan asked.
I panicked. I had this very weird feeling. I feel anxious and worried that if I disclose his real name, bad things would happen to us. I didn't want that!
"Wai Kit." I answered. I remember this very clearly because that guy's name is NOT Wai Kit! But I had to lie. He was calm and just smile. He didn't said anything. Then I wanted to go to his parent's house at the hill, but before I can say anything, a lady came out of nowhere. I know that woman but am not naming her. She purposely kissed him on the lips to show me that he belong to her. And he didn't even struggle one bit. He didn't seem to enjoy it, but he definitely did not reject it either.
I felt disappointed. I felt sad. I felt like wanting to cry. He type a message and showed it to me his phone. "I'm fine. Don't worry."
I turn my back and walk back into the house. I took one last look at him. He was reversing the car and didn't look at me, I think.
And I woke up.
I remember every single detail. His face. His expression. His voice. His touch. And that feeling I had when I was still dreaming. It was so real. So real that I really wanted it to last.
Is it a sign? For something to come soon? For something to end?
I don't know. But I want him.